Monday, August 8, 2011

Endless Chatter

Have you ever found yourself in the presence of someone that just will not stop talking?  A person that does not understand what it is to have a meaningful conversation that includes allowing all parties involved to speak?  Why is it that I find myself in this position time after time?  Do my opinions and thoughts really not matter that much to you that think you have to control every moment of time spent with me with the endless chatter that you believe to be so pertinent?  And by the time we part ways, I end up feeling almost worthless, having no true value as a friend or companion.  

I had always been taught to not interrupt a person while they are speaking and to continue to have eye contact with them, not only to show you are paying attention but also as a sign of respect.  When concentrating on what the speaker is saying, you should not only close your mouth and not say anything until they have completed their thought, but open your mind to understand what they are trying to convey.  I believe it goes deeper than only opening your mind, you need to open your heart, allowing the truth and honesty to flow freely without judgment or ridicule.  

Although, I do completely understand when the other person is rattling on and on and on, that you do end up, subconsciously, toning them out.  I am sure there have been times that it is a conscious decision to stop listening.  I will admit, I am guilty of this.  Honestly, when the topic is something that I feel is of little importance to myself or has been previously beaten to death in a discussion, I will most likely stop listening.  When I start feeling like my viewpoint has become unwelcome or unwanted, I do allow myself to become distracted and lose interest in the conversation.      

I had a short dialog with a person in my close circle about when people talk over you, feel the need to control the conversation, or when your words are blatantly ignored.  I was not surprised at all when I learned that these people have controlling tendencies. Also, the person may feel that they are never heard nor understood, or the opposite and just need to be the center of attention.  There could also be the possibility that they do not understand proper etiquette with interacting with other people.  Actually, a couple of these I have been guilty of from time to time, usually when I am super excited about the information I have to share.      

Why initiate a conversation with someone if your idea of a good discussion is one-sided?  Why would you want to be guilty of the endless chatter?  Think about how it feels when you have been the person to walk away and know you have not gotten a word in edgewise.  Not such a great feeling to be completely honest, am I correct?  Think about it next time you are spending time with someone other than yourself.  If you value your own opinion that much, talk to yourself.  If you want to be valued, and respected, by others, allow them to join in the discussion with you.     

Closing thought:  Shut up and allow the other person(s) to speak.  Plain and simple.
* ˚ ˚˚ ˛* 。 ˛°

No comments:

Post a Comment